Checking in …

Hi everyone,

It’s been a long time since I’ve been here.

Everything’s OK with my growing little embryo, but I’ve been completely out of commission with Hyperemesis Gravidium. Haven’t been able to drag myself from my bathroom to my computer.

The first ultrasound nearly 2 weeks ago showed the sac, and a 100bpm heart. Just a few beats below the normal range, so a bit concerning, but CCRM said 100 is just fine at this point, don’t worry.

Next ultrasound is this coming Tuesday, but I’m just surviving one hour at a time right now. Hopefully I’ll be able to update shortly after that ultrasound.

More Bleeding & Nausea

The past two days I've had major nausea, a tell-tale sign that everything is okay. I was sick 24 hours a day for 5 months with Cooper and it was awful -- so I hope that's not a sign of another rough pregnancy. But just when I convinced myself that the nausea had to mean that everything was okay, I started to bleed again. The bright red blood is so scary to see, and puts me right back on the rollercoaster ride wondering if everything is going to be okay.

Our ultrasound next Wednesday can't come soon enough.

Bleeding Stopped!

After a couple hours of thinking that this was it, the bleeding stopped as quickly as it came.

It stayed away all last night and today.

So I'm hoping that means I'm in the clear!!

We'll know for sure next week at the ultra sound.

Bleeding

Shit.

I just went to the bathroom and my panty-liner had red blood, and I wiped and I had deep red blood. More than just pink watery spotting I had during the week of implantation.

We called our clinic to let them know about this. And to let them know that my beta #3 that I had yesterday came back at (3200). 16dp5dt. Which is a good beta number. But then let them know about the bleeding today. They suggested I change my panty liner. If it soaks through in a half an hour, to call back immediately. This is a very bad sign. But if it doesn't, it could just be bleeding caused from the progesterone supositories that I'm still taking.

I do not feel good about this.

Now I guess it's just a wait and see.

And try to stay as calm as possible.

Pregnancy Symptoms -- Before Beta Test

And just because we can't help ourselves...


No matter how hard we may try not to obsess during our two week waits...

I have posted a complete list of pregnancy symptoms during my 2ww, starting with the day of my 5 day transfer:

Transfer Day - BED REST all day. No symptoms. A little sore and tired.

1dp5dt – achiness in ovaries, lower back pain. Probably from the bed rest. BED REST

2dp5dt – sharp, brief pain in left nipple early in the morning. Tired. Achy lower back. Slow, strong pulsating heartbeat. Indigestion, a bit of gas. (also ate Mexican today), a little bit nauseous. Some tingly breast pains (left breast) in the evening. OUT OF BED, BUT JUST MOVING SLOWLY AROUND THE HOTEL ROOM.

3dp5dt – Soreness in the abdomen late in the day.
Overnight – woke up with wave of nausea (about 5 mins). Happened twice. TRAVEL DAY.

4dp5dt - Tender ovaries/abdomen area. A little crampy (like period but not quite). Easily tired. Can just feel something down there – a heaviness. Hot flashes. FIRST DAY HOME. BACK TO NORMAL ACTIVITY, EXCEPT FOR THE LIFTING AND EXCERCISE RESTRICTION.

5dp5dt – Nothing for most of the day. Crampy, heavy, tender feeling in abdomen (Feels kind of like period is coming). Hot flashes.

6dp5dt – Constipated. A funny steel-taste in my mouth. Tender, crampy abdomen – almost like a tightening, tugging, uncomfortable feeling. No nausea, but the feeling that comes after you barf, just a yucky feeling. A feeling that “I think I’m pregnant” – so much so that I said it out loud. A tickly breathing sensation. Extremely tried. A pulsing in my stomach, slow and steady. Thirsty.

7dp5dt – No symptoms all morning. No symptoms afternoon/evening, except being tired. Worried that I was wrong.

8dp5dt – Woke up in morning, still no symptoms. Felt so strongly that something was happening a few days ago, and now nothing. Dull ache in ovaries. Tired. Extremely tired in afternoon. No feeling in stomach though. Thirsty and a slight headache.

9dp5dt – Blood test morning. No symptoms really in the morning. About 10 minutes of cramps that felt like period cramps. Watery Pink Spotting at 2pm. Worried if this is my period. More pink watery spotting at 3pm. Some more period cramps. A little nausea and heartburn. BETA #1 came back 193!!!

10dp5dt – Spacey feeling, Blurred, vision, a little dizzy. Very tired.

11dp5dt - Dull Period-like cramps. Nothing else to speak of. BETA #2 came back at 385! It doubled exactly!

12dp5dt- Slightly tender breasts, headache, dull period cramps, tired.

And here is a link to my blog, from the symptoms I recorded before my first pregnancy for comparision. I know we all try not to obsess, but who am I kidding, it's all we do. I know everyone is different, but you might as well have some real symptoms to compare yours to:


http://waywardstork.blogspot.com/2008/11/2ww-bfp-symptoms.html


GOOD LUCK to everyone out there who is waiting on your beta. I know it's hard, but try to remember, it's out of your hands. You've done the best that you can do. And whatever the outcome, you should be proud of yourself.

I am sending out a virtual blanket of hugs, blessings and miracles to every single one of you.
xo

Beta #2 is in!

It doubled, exactly!

Our second beta came in at 385. Which means, the reality is setting in. I am PREGNANT. We are going to have another baby!

Cooper will have a brother or sister. Or maybe even both!

It really is an amazing success story, when you think that we tried for years and years and were given up on by one of the top fertility clinic's in the Northwest, who said, and I quote, "You have a less than 5% chance of this ever happening, even with IVF. I'm sorry. I don't think we can help you anymore."

And here I am. 36 years old (much, much older than when we started, with worse odds and worse eggs, and a partner with even worse sperm) and here we are. Pregnant. With our second child! I honestly didn't think we would ever have even one. Let alone two. I know we aren't out of the woods yet, I know we could lose this pregnancy, I know any list of bad things could still happen. But right now, we are pregnant, and we are going to celebrate it! These are the moments you wait for and hope for in life and so, they are worth celebrating, no matter what the final outcome. So, it's time to put worry on the backburner and enjoy what is right here, right now. And squeeze every ounce of happiness out of it that we can.

And in the meantime, CCRM will continue to test my hormones every week and start to wean me off my meds. And on Feb. 15th I will have an ultrasound to see if there is a sac and a heartbeat. And if all is well, I will graduate to an OBGYN.

I can still hardly believe all this happened.

CCRM is truly the land where miracles happen, and I am blessed to be one of their amazing success stories.

Thank you Dr. Schoolcraft and John Stevens...

For everything.